Challenge 22: Life at (almost) 30th
Next year in May, I’ll reach my 30th. It is the gate to enter the human prime of life. When we are at 30–39th, we are at the peak of power as a human. It is the best years of human’s life. But, what life has been taught me for (almost) 30 years?
Life has taught me that we cannot have everything in this world. I cannot do everything by myself. Therefore, arrange the priority is essential. For instance, in a particular situation I must choose to learn making a pain de Campagne; or making napa cabbage kimchi, or herbs gardening or maintaining my house to be always neat and clean, or teaching my kids to learn the alphabet, or giving my self a peaceful time to read a good book. Sometimes I want to do all at my weekend. But it is so impossible. I only have 24 hours per day. Therefore, ideally, I should be able to arrange my priority according to my personal goal. So that I can distribute my limited time and energy effectively. It is so stressful at the beginning for me to admit that I can’t have or do everything I want. But, I have no other choices except to accept it. So, I just let it go all the chances I can’t take due to my limited conditions. But it’s okay (for me) to keep the desire inside my mind. Perhaps someday I’ll meet a similar or better opportunity in the future ahead. Or create my chances. Haha.
Secondly, I just realize that I have full autonomy to my mind and my body. It is the concept that I didn’t comprehend when I was at 20th. When I was in high school I never had hair bangs because my mother didn’t like it. I was afraid to cut my hair because my father didn’t like it. Just after I married, I was afraid to dream of continue to work because of my shallow understanding of woman rights. I was afraid to look after myself before my family and other people because I didn’t understand that it was totally acceptable. And now, I think I begin to conceive how world is work. All failure, success, disappointment, contentment will always change in this world as a spinning wheel. I’ll experience all those states with no one but myself. Therefore, be kind, be gentle, be nice, listen to my own need and voices are essential for me life happily and gratefully.
When I was at the 20ths, I saw people at 30th is a mature, grown-up one. But apparently, it is not so for me. I feel no significant differences in my adultness disposition. Yes, several things are improved, some of them are decreased, some are going nowhere. And all is fine. Because for me, life at 30th is just beginning. Yes, life is getting real and serious, but it is also more fun, more challenging, more meaningful. I know my physical ability is not as good as my self at the 20ths, but I am sure that psychologically I grow better and sharpen (self-assessment, the bias applied hehe). I hope I’ll be wiser at the next future time, but if I choose to be a little ambitious and hungry at my prime-time I believe it is understandable. Hahaha.
Good night. :)
